The Talktown Yuro Cup 2004 (Not sponsored by Marmite)

The Pride, the Passion, the Marmite! After the runaway success of the Talktown Whirld Cup in 2002, we now present The All New Talk Yuro Cup 2004, where the residents of Talktown battle it out to the death in a life and death battle to the end of life and death. Alternatively, it could be based on a footie competition of a similar name.

Assuming the latter option, the teams from the aforementioned footie tourny, the R/L teams were shuffled about a bit and Talkers asked to pick a number that represented one of the teams. Whatever number was chosen by one of the said residents became their team. The teams have now been put back into their respective groups, and the current first round group tables are shown below.

For anyone that has accidentally stumbled across this page whilst looking for the R/L European Cup, boy do you need a new search engine!

Day 1

Just so people know (Zil is rather proud about this bit), Zil beat Fishter against all odds yesterday - was rather a satisfying game. Tho' not for Fishter.

Of course, kat also beat Bomber, which was disappointing - Zil would've rather Bomber had got the points and went through, but still.

Next up, The Geese find themselves pitched against Daisy, whilst Ponder and Jude clash in a much-anticipated match.

Day 2

What an awesome turnaround. Ponder was so out of it but woke up in extree time to spread some dodgy brown coloured slices of toast and snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Better stick to the Welsh Rarebit!

The second day's (in)action saw Daisy and the Geese spread it really thinly.

Day 3

I'm ashamed to say, I was not on form today, so I really can't mention anything about Day 3.

Having said that, I must say Mrs P was really flattered by her final score and Shell, despite her injuries, played very well. Deserved a better result, IMO. And having said that, wow, did you see them spreads from Larson? Awesome!

Day 4

Astonishingly, Beaker came out [from the back of the sofa] and scored first. Ats was having none of it, however, and he now leads the group. Coats finally managed to creep enough so she could team up with Daffy, but even the two of them couldn't see off Ace, who really had the Dodgy Duo on the ropes towards the end. Some good Lookey-likeys today; Ace seems to have employed Dick 'Two Jags' Prescott as coach, and Daffy/Coats thought they'd try the sympathy vote by putting Eastender's Kidney Transplant victim Rohan Ferreira as sub for Kevin Kuranyi. Daffy and Coats also tried an outside attempt at taking control of the match by putting Robocop in goal in place of Oliver Kahn.

Day 5

Poor Bomber. Poor Waleski. Cruelly reduced to ten men after Bomber slipped his arm in the Marmite, the Welshovics fought bravely but Fishter's young sub, Ronaldo (sporting a close Lookey-Likey to Leonardo Di Caprio, I might add) was too much and his spreading pace saw the downfall of the Red Brigade. Who were playing in white.

In today's other game, Zil showed that she was not all mouth and ra-ra skirt, taking one of the favourites for the Cup, Kat, to an interesting draw. Should now be an intriguing Suffolk derby between Kat and Fishter to see who joins Zil in the Round of Eight.

The Lookey-Likey compo hotted up following confirmation that it was the Russian coach, Georgi Yartsev, that took the Geoff Hoon title whilst Fishter's supremo Figo took a Quantum Leap into Scott Bakula.

Day 6

Wayne Looney managed to really put Ponder in the dumps in the 'Handbags at Dawn' challenge against Daisy, who, had he not been fast a kip in the tunnel of lurve, could have given Ponder reason to celebrate.

In today's other game, The Geese shocked Jude by pretending they didn't want to play in the first half only to come out battling in the second. I think this was purely due to the fact that they'd substituted their goalie with ex-Double World Champion Damon Hill and it seems he got stuck in the pits until half-time!

Day 7

Right that's it! If Shell don't let me win the next game, I'm gonna take my marmite home:-P She's going home anyway, so I want to win by at least 10-nil, OK?

And the less said about today's other game, the better! Just goes to show what happens when you allow Richard Branson to take control of things!

Day 8

Ats v Scrumble/GbH, quite simply the best game of marmite ever, I reckon. It had everything, shots hitting the crusts, some really good spreading and real slice to slice action. Shame Ats won, really, a point a piece could have seen Daffy going out after the next game!

Today's other game saw a spirited fight by Beaker to share the marmite spoils with Daffy. A totally underserved result due to the underhand cheating by Daffy coupled with the blatent rule flouting of having defender Lahm substituted by a cow. Daisy, you really shouldn't have been in the squad you know!

With one match left to play in each group, only one resident, Ats, has managed to secure their place in the Round of 8. Everywhere else, it's all to spread for!

Day 9

Despite a defeat in the last game, Liz lives up to the reputation she was trying to forge for herself, and manages to scrape thru' to the Round of Eight. Big up to Bomber for finally showing that he could play. Too late, mate!

Sadly, Liz's defeat meant that kat got put out for the night again, but then she really should have tried playing a bit more!

Day 10

For a while there, Ponder was the happiest resident of all, but he will insist on playing that Looney fellow, so he really made a mess of things in the end, with a 6 slice thriller against The Geese. Sadly, he now goes against Fishter.

In today's other marmite action, Jude put Daisy out of our misery to set up a Round of Eight Clash with Zil. Should be interesting to see what effect ra-ra skirts have on the enigmatic Jude team.

An excellent display today, as well, by Ponder's substition of Paul Scholes for Dave Gorman. An awesome Googlewhack if ever there was one.

Day 11

Bah!

Day 12

Far too much pinny peeking from Coats means that she and Daffy make the long trudge home as another favourite fails to live up to the hype. Ats becomes the only resident to have gained maximum points from the group stages.

Today's other mis-match saw Ace and GbH send Beaker back behind the sofa. Better luck next time Beaker;-)

So on to the Round of Eight, with some real marmite-munching action to come. Not sure what they're going to use for marmite now tho' as I'm taking it home with me, so there!

Day 13

Following a disastrous start for Ponder an inspired decision by him to replace the entire team with the Italian squad after the wonderboy Looney's departure saw Fishter take the honours in the first Round of 8 match. But what drama to get there!

Day 14

Is there no stopping the ra-ra skirted Zil? With scant regard for Jude's marmite prowess in past competitions, she take the honours to move into the Round of Four. Jude takes the short trip home. And there was much rejoicing;-)

Day 15

Yet another marmite chewing slice-off sees the dynamic duo end Mrs Ponder's dream of a surprise upset. Ace/GbH go on to meet Fishter (who doesn't deserve to be there) in the Round of Four.

Day 16

Just as we were all about to fall asleep, Ats ups the ante and casts Babel Fish disdainfully aside. Suffice to say, there will be a full inquiry in the event that Ats wins the competition considering his other half won the last one!

Speaking of AOH, she spotted an excellent Lookey-likey in this match (tho' one must consider some insider trading in this one) after Ats decided to put all-action hero Patrick Swazy in place of Pavel Nedved.